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Disappointment in yourself


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Do y'all have any recommendations on how to deal with disappointment in yourself for being so careless, I guess this goes hand-in-hand with shame. Ive always been so responsible in every aspect of my life, and I really blew it when it came to unprotected sex. I absolutely knew better.

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Same here. Apparently my head has been in the sand for 20 years. Never had those severe google pic outbreaks just a small cut here and there and what felt like a yeast infection. Now tonight I have to break the news to someone I thought could be my future spouse. I'm bracing for rejection.

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If you contracted HSV via intercourse, it may help to understand that condoms reduce but do not eliminate risk of transmission. If you contracted HSV via oral sex, it may help to know that using barrier methods for oral sex is uncommon. Most people take that risk with the majority of their sex partners without even thinking about it. Additionally, many people contract herpes in long-term monogamous relationships in which most people do not use barrier methods for intercourse or oral sex. What else? I don't know your gender or which type of HSV you have, but I can tell you that in the U.S., studies indicate 5% of 14-49 year old women with a history of only one sex partner have HSV2. 19% of women in that age range with a history of 2-4 sex partners have HSV2. 37% of women in that age range with a history of 10+ sex partners have HSV2. By mid-forties, regardless of number of sex partners, more than a quarter of married women and more than half of single women have HSV2. It is very common, even among women with conservative sexual histories.

 

It might also help to consider how we think about oral cold sores. When you are feeling shame about genital herpes, maybe ask yourself if you would feel the same way if you had a cold sore. If not, why not?

 

You may also find this infographic helpful: http://projectaccept.org/who-gets-hsv/

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