PLS HELP! Freaked out that I may have given my partner ghsv1 but many factors point to no- thoughts?

So my partner and I haven’t had sex in over two weeks and I have hsv 1 genitally (I’m female) the last time we had sex I was on daily antiviral therapy and we didn’t use a condom. Flash forward 2+ weeks: He said his penis was a bit irritated a few days ago and then he masturbated and it made it worse, he now has what looks kind of like a laceration near the head of his penis. It doesn’t look like any hsv outbreak I’ve ever seen, he didn’t have any bumps or blisters, any ulcers (just one kind of raw spot that doesn’t look ulcery just sorta chafed) or any crusting. In addition, the first outbreak of gsv1 is almost always pretty severe from what I’ve read and this doesn’t even look like herpes to me and is only slightly irritating to him. It also usually takes fewer than 2 weeks for symptoms to show after exposure, and it’s been over two weeks. Also if I was taking daily antiviral therapy it wouldn’t really make sense that I’d have given it to him when I had no symptoms and was on antivirals and have type one which is harder to contract. Any thoughts? Could this just be irritation from something? We would go to the doctor, but there are no actual sores for them to swab and getting blood tested for hsv1 would be inconclusive because it wouldnt show where the infection was if it even showed he had it at all. I’m freaking out, he’s cool as a cucumber but I was just wondering if it’s valid for me to deduce that this isn’t hsv given the symptoms, time frame, me on antivirals with no symptoms + type one, etc.? Thanks in advance for any help!

I would recommend that he get the suspect area tested via swab by a doctor.

There are documented cases of herpes outbreaks that look like small cuts rather than blisters and sores.

You really can’t deduce anything from what you’ve described. It will be a long and stressful wait for you, but the only thing that is going to produce an answer is him getting tested.

He had it looked at by a urologist who said he was 100% sure it was just chafing and would not even recommend getting a test for herpes because he was so sure, as he's seen a lot of herpes and a lot of chafing in his career... lol. There was also nothing to swab, so that test was impossible and it also was gone the next day. Also blood tests for HSV 1 are notoriously not very good with a 30% chance that you're still positive even if you test negative, plus I don't even know his HSV status pre-me haha. So I'm just going to trust the urologist which I think is alright to do, since he sees a lot of penis issues on a daily basis and I don't want to stress myself out too much when a urologist conclusively told him it wasn't herpes.

All very good points! I'm glad you guys can comfortably move on from this.

I would advise he get a HSV-1/2 IgG blood test. Though you are right that a positive HSV-1 test does not show where the infection is located, it does have a purpose. It shows whether the person is at risk for infection with HSV-1. If he is positive for HSV-1 and has never had symptoms, it is likely a oral infection. However, this would mean he is not at risk for a genital infection, and there would not be a need for condoms or suppressive therapy on your part concerning HSV-1 (condoms are still recommended for other STDs).

In addition, he may have HSV-2 and be putting you at risk of HSV-2 as well as HSV-1.