Social stigma

If it wasent for the horrible social stigma associated with herpes, I wouldn't feel so down about having it, I really wish I just knew who gave it to me like I wish I was tested for t at some point or I wish I actually got the full on outbreak I did in the incubation period I wish I knew how this shit was really spread its soo fucking annoying sometimes.

Honestly I think it was gods work because had I knew who gave it to me exactly god spared their lives and my freedom because lord know what I would have done, I just wish I had the honor and knowing who truly gave it to me that's all

Personally, I'm glad I don't know how and when I got it. It helps me understand that it was simply a natural consequence of physical intimacy with other humans, many of whom likely had HSV2. Considering 7/8 of those with HSV2 don't know they have it, I'm glad not to feel an urge to blame a specific person who likely passed it on unknowingly. And because it's equally likely I had it some time before testing, I'm grateful nobody I'm aware of resents for me being intimate with them before I tested for HSV.

I have absolutely had resentment toward the doctor who allowed me to get tested. I know that's unhealthy. I hope I can eventually let that go. The issue is not the doctor or the tests. The issue is the social stigma. So clearly my anger is misplaced. But I guess I'm grateful to be angry at a doctor rather than an intimate partner. It's probably easier in some ways.

It's not for me because sometimes I can't fully accept it I'm pretty sure I got it in the last 2 years , I dated different ppl I'm in my 20s for god sake some people I had sex w some people I didn't and I just would like to know who being that I got a full on outbreak months possibly years after my encounter