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Just diagnosed with Ghsv1, 2 days ago


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Well I was just recently diagnosed with ghsv1. I had my first OB, 3 days after having sex with an ex boyfriend. I had not been sexually active for a few years so when I seen him again a few weeks ago, I decided i would feel better doing so with someone familiar. A few days later, I was in alot of pain and it was only getting worse. I couldn't take it and went to see the doctor. She took tests and told me that she was almost sure it was Herpes. I cried for days. I feel ashamed, guilty, embarrassed, nasty, afraid, scared, unlovable, angry sad and lonely. And I felt I truly could only blame myself for being so stupid. I feel like there is a big possibility I might end up alone forever, and I won't have anymore children or if I do end up with someone, then my sex life will never be the same, cause I will always be worried about possibly giving it to my partner. Since then I have been researching anything and everything about herpes. I have been so extremely afraid of the possibility of somehow spreading this to my young children as well, taking extra percautions since. I got the results from my test back a few days ago. I feel a bit better than I did at first, but I still feel really worried and very self conscious. I let my ex boyfriend know, even tho he has never had an OB. He says he is gonna go get checked but hasn't really talked to me much since I've let him know.

Anyways, I appreciate any feedback or support, or information.

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You're going through the hardest part right now, and I can assure you that the majority of people here have thought / felt similar to how you do now.

I would recommend seeing a doctor and asking about antiviral medication, if you haven't already.

Also, you can get some really outstanding support from the "herpes buddies" thread, that helped me a ton!

Overall, remember that it doesn't change who you are. It won't stop you from achieving everything you have been working toward.

The biggest thing that got me through the hard times was focusing on the future, and making plans to do things that make me feel like myself. Pushing hard at work and school, and planning a trip to go to a concert gave me other things to think about, but more importantly, made me feel like the future wouldn't be so terrible.

If you have people close to you that you can talk to, be sure to talk to them.

Lastly, look for opportunities to help people close to you, their approval and appreciation will probably help make you feel better, too.

 

As far as dating,

I don't know for myself, but it seems like being H+ only ends up helping weed out crappy people. Someone who considers your disclosure for what it is, asking consent, and total honesty, is someone worth your time.

I can assure you that there are good people out there who are primarily looking for just those 2 things.

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@regularguy thank you for responding. It gives me alot of hope. And I know your absolutely right. I've been spending alot more time with family and so far I've only been able to spit it out to my aunt and cousin who I'm very close to. It's hard to talk about for me and I'm glad that I have found someplace to do so now. I'm barely going to start school again after the new year so that has helped with giving me something to look forward to. I'm trying to remain busy during the day instead of allowing my thoughts and constant worrying consume me. I have received the antiviral medicine. I know as time passes that things will get better. Thats what mostly gets me through the day. Thank you and I really appreciate what u said.!!

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It seems like your state of mind is in a pretty good place, and it's really great to know that you are following through with school!

You will be proud when you do just as well in school as you always have, and it will reaffirm that being H+ doesn't change your abilities one bit!

I know that it isn't easy, though. I still struggle with negative thoughts sometimes myself, but being able to look at who I am, and what I have accomplished after my diagnosis is actually a really positive thing these days. In just a couple of months, I have had a lot of success in work, school ans relationship, which I am really grateful for and proud of. You will too!

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