I'm 99.9% sure I have Genital Herpes.

I'm a 25 year old Male.

I had a one night stand with a girl November 9th (6 days ago). Overall it was a good experience, she was really sweet. I used a condom during intercourse but gave and received oral without protection (I didn't think much of it).

About two days later I started to notice little red marks around my genital area and on my penis. My neck was incredibly sore and it felt like I had a bad case of the flu. I started to panic.

I started to research the symptoms (for like 5 hours) and came to the conclusion that she probably gave me HSV-2 that night. She claimed she was clean and still does.

The flu like symptoms lasted for about 3 days, they're just now starting to go away. The red marks are now looking a milky color and are extremely painful when touched/irritated.

I really don't know what to do, I'm lost. I can't stop the constant anxiety/panic going through my head that I actually have herpes. I can't believe this is actually happening to me, I made one mistake and now I'm permanently damaged. I now feel like I'm ostracized from society, like a leper.

The sad part is that I rarely have casual sex or get around, she was 4th girl I've ever been with. The social stigma around the virus only makes it worse, I can't even say the word herpes without cringing.

Because of this I'll never be able to have sex again or have a girlfriend in fear that I will infect them. I can't believe this is happening to me.

I haven't told anyone yet besides this post. I haven't been diagnosed or visited the doctors either. I think I'm still in a state of shock and disbelief.

I don't know what to do, the intrusive thoughts won't stop and they're literally driving me insane. This depression is taking me hostage. I feel almost suicidal at this point.

Please someone help. SOS.

You've come to the right place to climb out of the hole you find yourself in. You're in good company. Know that the truth about herpes isn't what it's all cracked up to be in your head. Don't believe everything you think. ;)

Start here ...

Download the e-book & handouts:

https://herpesopportunity.com/free-ebook-signup.html

Watch this video I made summarizing the facts:

http://bit.ly/1hjPxJo

Listen to the Q&A audio recording with Terri Warren with the H Opp community:

https://herpesopportunity.com/terri-warren.html

Watch our video interview with top herpes researcher Dr. Peter Leone

http://bit.ly/2ikZ89g

http://bit.ly/2AQJMRl (“What about oral?”)

And if you're ready to make yourself stigma bulletproof, purchase the Lifestyle Guides I created to give people step-by-step support to get feeling better quick (it also helps to keep our community running):

https://herpesopportunity.com/lifestyle-guides.html

HSV-2 is rarely transmitted by oral sex (HSV-1 is more likely) and you may already be infected with HSV-1 (over 50% of the population is infected orally in childhood). Performing oral sex on a person's genitals infected with genital HSV-2 can transmit the virus to the oral cavity. However, HSV-2 does not like the oral cavity and will rarely even have asymptomatic shedding or a break ever again. In fact, people that are in a HSV-2 discordant relationship often infect themselves orally in order to develop antibodies to prevent genital infection.

In addition, your symptoms appeared rather fast for HSV, and are not classic for the virus, and likely reflect other viral etiology (common cold). Condoms also are rather efficient at preventing HSV transmission.

I would advise you get tested now for HSV-1/2 by serology. If you are positive, you will know that it did not come from this encounter. However, be warned that HSV-1/2 serology test can demonstrate false positives. You will need to be tested at 12-16 weeks if you are negative on the first test to ensure you are in fact negative.

Thank you Adrial! I've admire your dedication to this site. I've seen you comment on countless threads comforting people in their hour(s) of darkness,thank you.

Okay I'll go and get tested to make sure I know what I have (hopefully nothing but I doubt it.) Thank you for your support during this time, I'm glad I found this website and all the caring people associated with it!

Are a sore throat and hair loss common symptoms of the virus?

There are many causes of hair loss; however HSV is not one of them. There have been reports of alopecia following acyclovir therapy. HSV can cause a sore throat if infected orally; however, this can occur with any virus or bacteria and the symptom of a sore throat has no specificity for HSV infection.

Don't beat yourself up over a one night stand. My gosh, it's the 21'st century!!! You used a condom which was very wise. I agree with @Jack101 odds are you you didn't get H from this encounter. It is possible, of course, but read the handout! You may have something else....anxiety can cause lots of fictitious ailments. Just trying to stay positive here.

Thank you Jack for your information. I will make a doctor's appointment this wee (they were closed on the weekend) ans see what's really going on. I'm still 99.9% it's herpes as the symptoms all lead to it. And thank you Kati. I guess you're right, I shouldn't feel guilty for a one night stand as it's a very common thing. I just feel I've made a terrible mistake that's irreversible.

Oh yeah, is there any remedy for the red blisters/lesions on my genital area? They hurt so bad if even slightly touched.

Thanks for your support guys!

Your sex life is not over. By a long shot. In fact it is just beginning in some ways. Check out my ladies' man herpes disclosure success thread. I've disclosed and slept with over 70 girls in recent years.

@hippyherpy. That is refreshing to hear. Although I don't think I could bring myself to sleep with someone knowing they could be infected. I would never want to wish this upon someone.

@hippyherpy. That is refreshing to hear. Although I don't think I could bring myself to sleep with someone knowing they could be infected. I would never want to wish this upon someone.

That is how I feel too! So conflicted all the time!

Yeah. Considering there is always a chance of them catching it, I couldn't live with myself if they did.

Looks like celibacy is the only road for me (sad but true). Hey at least I can still jack off to porn right? (Not during an outbreak of course lolol.)

As of yet I have still have no desire to do anything, even alone. Hopefully the “wanting” of it comes back though.

How long have you had it? It's been about a week for me and I also have no desire for sex/masturbation. Maybe this whole thing is a blessing in disguise as I can focus more of my energy on my life goals and growing stronger as a person.

I'm Jason by the way!

I’ve known I’m H+ since September. Not long, IMO, as it is still all I think about. It’s nice to meet you Jason. My name isn’t common, so I’d rather not share, just in case.

Since September, so not too long at all. So how long did the first outbreak last? Mine only seems to be getting worse in terms of the lesions/blisters forming in my genital area. The flu symptoms seem to come and go but when they come it's pretty bad. I can barely focus on my studies and feel like I'm going to freeze to death.

And I understand about the not wanting to share your name, this virus is pretty nasty and very unfair. Hey maybe someday they'll invent a time machine and we can go back and undo what we've done haha.

My case is completely different than most on here. I’ve never had an outbreak. No lesions or blisters. Just went in for my annual and BAM, HSV1 positive. Once I knew that I have it, I did a lot of research to see if maybe I missed signs or anything for that matter, but I didn’t. About 2 wks into knowing I am H+ I stated having prickly pin like feelings and a lot of itching, but still no lesions. Idk if it’s in my head or all the stress, but it’s there and hasn’t gone away yet. Some days worse than others.

I’m in college too! What is your major?

No outbreak? Interesting. And yeah I heard that stressing out can be a trigger for an outbreak or the 'itchy'/'tingly' feeling. I can only imagine what finals week is going to be like haha.

I am studying mechanical engineering, what about you?

I’m trying to stress less, but work, kids, sports, school, and now this.... stress is inevitable.

I’m going for accounting. Finals week always sucks. This only makes it worse.

Bro don't blow this out of proportion. You know that 4/5 people in the world have herpes, right? It doesn't stop the boots from getting knocked. Don't crave drama. Stigma preys on people's penchant for wanting drama in their lives. The herpes stigma is one of the greatest hoax advertising scams of all time. You get trolled while pharmaceutical companies make heaps of money.

Also, girls can make up their own minds. A lot of them have it and don't even know or don't disclose. It's up you as a man to put your foot down and say "I'm not going to submissive to an ad campaign." And take the initiative and own your shit. You tell you got herpes. If she says she doesn't care, that's her choice. If she wants more info you can give her info. This is 2017, women can make their own life choices. If she want to fuck you, that's up to her. Respect that.

It's up to us guys to get the wheels moving on disclosing because most girls are too afraid to do it.

You may disagree with me now, but you are new to this. When you get more info, you will understand that herpes is not a big deal at all.

 

You may disagree with me now, but you are new to this. When you get more info, you will understand that herpes is not a big deal at all.

I truly can’t wait to get to this point. So many of you are so excepting, but is it only because we all are H+? Would you be just as accepting if you weren’t? The thoughts that are in my mind I can’t control. It’s never ending...

The truth will set you free. Most people don't know much about herpes at all. Then someone gets it and there's all this info they take in about it. They realize that they didn't really know much about it before.

That's part of the marketing campaign/stigma- to keep people iconfused or in a fog about what herpes is. They just hear words like "incurable" which sounds scary. But having an incurable thing that doesn't even cause symptoms for 80% who have it isn't a big deal. And those that do get symptoms usually have like one outbreak or something mild and then they don't get symptoms again.

I also would love to get to that point of "it's not a big deal at all". I think you make a good point @lostandconfused99 that because we have the virus we are now more accepting of it.

I a girl was seeing were to tell me she had herpes I honestly don't think I would continue seeing her as the virus is permanent and that relationship may/may not be. It wouldn't be worth the risk for a five second orgasm.

I also agree on the intrusive thoughts not stopping. It's happening here too. As soon as I wake up in the morning the first thought that comes to mind is "I have herpes" and casts a dark cloud over the rest of my day.

I'm trying not to blow this out of proportion. I think I'm just still in shock that it has actually happened. I won't give up hope though. Maybe I can become a monk or some shit and find inner peace.

I agree, before this happened to me, I wouldn’t have given a second thought to being with someone if they had told me they had herpes, my answer would have immediately been no. Now, I’m left to feel that being with someone who is H+ is my only choice. Either that or never being sexually actively (with a man) again. I do look forward to the day that I can feel less like “why me” and more excepting of this condition. With this still being so new to me, I’m not there. I dread every day knowing that someone infected me. Knwonging that I have t have this for the rest of my life. Knowing that every time I choose to be intimate with someone or in a new relationship that I have to disclose that I am in fact H+. All of this is still overwhelming and I haven’t been able to wrap my head around it. It really is a lot to take in and learn. The stigma of herpes sucks, but it’s what is out there and that is what I am left to deal with daily.

@lostandconfused99. How were you diagnosed with herpes. If you were diagnosed by a blood test for HSV-1 and have never had symptoms, you likely have oral herpes and were infected in childhood. Over 67% of the world's population is infected with HSV-1 orally and most of the men you meet will have oral herpes. Even if you have genital herpes, you do not have to worry about effecting people with HSV-1. As such, 6-7 out 10 people with have HSV-1.