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Scared , sick, depressed.. you name it!


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Hi. I'm a 34 yr old single mom who has just been diagnosed and awaiting confirmation from labs. I have sores, extremely bad sore throat, nausea, fever, chills/sweats, headache, body aches exhaustion. I had unprotected sex with a new partner and am completely ashamed, disgusted, furious, embarrassed.. so many feelings! I am so upset that I put myself in this situation.

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I'm sorry you are suffering. The first time is the worst - I promise it gets better.

I know the feeling of being angry with yourself. But there are so many times in life that we do things by mistake. It doesn't make us bad or irresponsible. You can't blame yourself. There is always a possibility in sex, even protected sex, that you will get an STI. I'm sorry though that the person did not give you a heads up about their situation - it just make people feel angry, ashamed, and upset, which perpetuates the stigma associated with herpes. It's tough, I know. I remember when I was first diagnosed I wished I had been told I had cancer instead. But I'll tell you something - your life will go on. You will have other partners. You will remember that you are a lovable person. Other people will see that too. Keep checking in here and reading about people's experiences. XO

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Thank you FlowerPower. I am really glad that I found this forum for support. It means a lot to know that I'm not alone and to have words of encouragement, hope, and reassurance that life will go on. Thank you so much <3 xo

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I remember when I was first diagnosed and I felt the same way!

In all honesty honey, the only thing you neglected yourself of is protecting yourself. The funny thing about herpes though.... you can still contract it with a condom!

Either way you pretty much have no protection against herpes. You also have to thank your lucky stars it's not something more serious! So don't beat yourself up, I know it hurts but you have to ask yourself; Does it hurt more physically or is it mentally, the social stigma that's associated with herpes itself?

It's okay to feel ashamed I mean, no one is excited to have herpes.

Everything WILL go back to normal though and eventually you won't even realize you have it.

Herpes is definitely not something I'd lower my finger for in a game of "never have I ever". I don't talk about it with people I don't fully trust but when I do it connects me in a cool way. It seems like a curse right now, but, remember the universe would never hand you something you can't handle.

You're already a single mom, herpes ain't got nothing on you!

Use your outbreaks as a reason to escape from the kids! (lol)

I always go get a pedicure and massage when I have outbreaks. It's all the more reason to pamper yourself!

I wish you healing and love!

Love,

beautyintheugly22

 

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