Question re sex when both of you are H positive

So, I recently posted about finding out I had herpes a few days ago after a horrific primary outbreak. The guy I've been dating just got his test results and he tested positive so that solves the mystery. He had no symptoms and had no clue. We are continuing to date each other and I'm a little confused about what precautions, if any, we should take with having sex given we are both H-positive. I want to avoid having another outbreak and he obviously wants to avoid ever having an outbreak. From what I gathered, you should abstain from having sex at the onset of and during an outbreak. But my question is...if he doesn't get outbreaks and I don't feel myself on the brink of one, is it fine to have unprotected sex? We both have it so does it even matter? Can sex itself trigger an outbreak? If he had it for awhile and never got an outbreak are chances high that he won't ever get one?

Thanks all.

The answer is yes to the first two questions - you can't pass the same virus back and forth, once you have it, you have it :) sex can trigger an outbreak from what I've read. It's different for everyone of course, but friction seems to be the culprit so I've read using plenty of lube is recommended. As for his chances of never having an outbreak, that's hard to say. The majority with these viruses go years or forever without one, or with symptoms so mild they don't recornize them for what they are. So it's definitely possible. There's unfortunately no way of knowing for sure

Thanks for the response. Means a lot. So much of this is a mystery. As of today, I just finished 7 days of acyclovir and my symptoms are pretty much gone. I am debating whether I should see what my body does naturally without meds or if I should take a daily suppressive anti-viral. The idea of this reoccurring frequently in the same severity as I initially experienced is traumatic.

You're welcome! It is very much a mystery. I have questions always running through my mind and have tried to accept that I will probably never have an answer for everything! Even going based on others experiences is hard because everyone reacts differently to the viruses. You could always try to go without them (since you don't have to worry about passing it to your partner) and see what your body does. They say the primary is *typically* the worst. If you have another outbreak that's bad or have frequent outbreaks you could then do suppressive. Or, if you just decide for right now you'd rather take them, there's nothing wrong with that either!

@Esquire26 For you, it will take a few months for antibodies to build to a point that you will not need to be concerned about contracting the same virus in a second location. Until then, there is a small risk. For him, there is almost no risk (it is rare to contract the same virus in a second location after there are sufficient antibodies) but it is still recommended to avoid sex during outbreaks.

Thank you @optimist