Exposure with 2.53 igG - I'm married and also in a relationship with someone else

Hi everyone, I need help. I just found out that I've been exposed to hsv2. Only thing my doc could tell me is that it's been longer than 3 months. I don't think I've ever been tested for HSV before so I don't know if I've had this since college or if it's been in my recent encounters. Long story short, I'm married but have been having a rocky time and have slept with a few people in the past 7 months. In addition, I've been seeing someone seriously for the last 8 months so these test results have completely rattled me because neither my husband nor SO would have been the one to expose me to it which means TWO difficult conversations if I actually have it.

I had a 2.53 on the igG for HSV2 and 0 for HSV1. The only symptoms I have had were what I thought 2 yeast infections in one month (last month) and now, since I found out the results 3 days ago, I have bladder fullness and minor tingling down there, but I almost feels like it could be psychological since I'm shocked and scared by the test results. I can describe it as my nether region just doesn't feel like my own the past few days, I also had a Brazilian wax Monday so it could be psychological plus that.

My gyno is pretty confident it's not a false positive but I'm such a skeptic that I can't help but not want to believe her, especially after everything I've read on this forum. If I do have it, I think I know who would have exposed me but I've only hooked up with him 3 times, twice unprotected. Also, I'm asking her about helping me obtain a Western Blot Test but am intimated by the cost and the process of it all.

What is everyone's experience with such a low igG score and NOT ending up having Herpes? Especially after such few encounters with the suspected transmitter. I'm terrified and don't know where to go from here. My gyno keeps saying I've been exposed but do have the clinical disease. Can someone please help me understand what that means for my life?

Hi, @digitalmktggirl. Herpes is something that anyone can have, even acquiring it from their first sexual experience. So unless you and your husband definitively tested negative before getting married, it could just as easily be something either of you brought to the relationship. Also, one either has the virus or they don't. I don't know why doctors use the word exposed...perhaps they're trying to soften the blow because of the stigma?

The index value you have is considered positive, but Terri Warren, an expert on HSV has seen a fair number of false positives when index values are below 3.5. You could try retesting with another IgG in a few months, or just go forward with a western blot.

My HSV2 index value was 3.27. I had a western blot, and it confirmed I do have HSV2. Terri can help you order the test--most doctors aren't well versed in ordering it, and it's damn near impossible to figure out on your own. When I had it done about 18 mo ago, I think it was $250 and Terri made it extremely easy. Well worth the peace of mind to know for sure, if you ask me. You can find more info here: https://www.westoverheights.com/herpes/getting-a-western-blot/

87% of those with HSV are unaware they have it because their symptoms are mild or nonexistent. When I was diagnosed about a year after divorcing, I chose to tell my ex and he tested negative. That meant I had both strains (1 and 2) for 18-25 years and not only had no idea, but did not give it to my ex. Transmission can be pretty easy in some respects (I used condoms with every partner before getting married), but it's not a given! You can also find good basic information here: https://www.westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/

Either way, I can say with confidence your life is far from over. :)

@hikinggirl Thank you for your response, you've given me a boost of hope and strength.

I found out that I have never been tested for HSV before in my life so I have no idea how long I've had it. Although, I confided in a college friend who I slept with many years ago and he had a clean STD panel 18 months ago so it is likely that I was exposed by one of the 3 new men in the past several months or something that my husband and I exposed each other to previously.

I'm considering a western blot but over the past couple of days, have already started to come to terms with my new normal. I don't know if I'm ready to drop $300 or so to have Terri help me get the test when it's likely that I'll receive the same result.

It's been a whirlwind of a week for me, I disclosed to three past hookups last night via text (I would have preferred in person but it's not that simple since I'm married and can't just go meet them all to talk) and two of the three were very smooth, both men made me feel good about disclosing. They thanked me for telling them and never once made me feel blamed or shameful. The third one ignored me, but he and I just hooked up only one day before my diagnosis so he's clearly in shock.

Wish me luck over the next couple of weeks! This weekend I will disclose to my boyfriend/love of my life tomorrow in person. He has no idea it's coming. Then I will be speaking with my therapist on how to break this news to my husband since I have cheated (which will be his first assumption) but there's a chance I've had this for many years, before my infidelity. It's going to be extremely scary.