Blood positive for HSV-1, just need to get this off my chest.

Hello everyone.

Before I had taken a FULL PANEL STD urine and blood test, I was dating everything in sight. I had about 20-something sexual partners... not one has ever asked me to take an STD TEST.

Then, I dated my first white (non-Hispanic) woman (with serious-potential). She asked if I had a clean bill of health, I told her that I had nothing to worry about because I never had symptoms or something to worry about.

The closest thing was PHIMOSIS, and that had a biopsy... they checked it, and gave me a cream and I was on my way.

After the weekend of super hardcore sex... I decided to get tested. My heart dropped. I am seuropositive for HSV1.

My aunts have cold sores from time to time. We are Hispanic and come from a third world country.

Now, the red head didn't want kids, so we broke up (mutual), but she accept d the fact I was HSV1 positive.

Then, I finally met her... the woman of my dreams. One that surpassed my previous girlfriend and everyone else.

Beautiful

Smart

A great smile that would make you drop your guard.

We were already kissing, and already making plans for sex. (I work fast)

She wanted to have me the first night and skip dinner. She just wanted to get plowed (I talk a big game because I can back it up).

But I told her to wait three dates. (Not my usual tactic, but I wanted her to judge me based on our dates.)

The first night, the kiss just happened. Well, the passionate kisses happened for hours.

The second night, comedy club, dinner, a good ol'time.

The day after, she tells me what she wanted me to do to her, Orally.

Then I caved in. I told her that I have an STD and it is HSV1. (I had a guilt trip. I told her the truth before any sex happened.)

What I noticed is that she and the previous woman did not know what it was... like if it wasn't part that of the std panel that they get.

White girl, accepted

Mexican girl, freaked the hell out. Rejected me. Now, she feels betrayed, upset and scared.

I did explain that 2/3 of the world's population has this.

Now, I am super bummed.

I feel like a monster. I don't know if it is my mouth or my dick because I don't get symptoms.

I am Latino, 31, male, stocky and fit for a guy my size.

I will admit, I was ignorant of HSV1 until I got the results back.

But man, I never felt rejection like this.

I stopped dating, deleted all my dating apps. I am hoping that this last girl is researching HSV1 and comes back.

Do I have to disclose before the kiss or before sex?

Igg hsv1 spec is at 35.5

Forgot to mention that.