The Call -

Hi All --

Late post but I had to share.

As some of you know I was shamed, blamed and felt humiliated by my boyfriend whom broke up with me when I received a call from my doctor I had HSV2 and reported it to him immediately last week.

He was quick to state that he "better not have this" and "we will see who is lying"....

Well i got my results back after my first outbreak yesterday negative for IgG. However, I know in about 3 months or less that will change. The swab was positive and I had a heck of a first outbreak.

Much to my surprise I received a call today from my ex...his results came back positive for HSV2 at a 5. He of course said his life was ruined...he was screwed and claimed this must be false. He must retest and see a real doctor and not go through a lab for IgG testing....and that it is impossible. He stated this cannot happen to me.....shocking right?....everything I was thinking and crying to "myself" last week.

Instead, of saying what I wanted to say which was (well not so nice)....I thought about this forum...what I have learned, how would a real human being diagnosed with HSV2 respond...thanks to all posts. I said... you are loved...you are a strong man...you will get through this...you will grieve...if you need me I am here.

I honestly don't know if 5 is a high number? I told him about the Western Blot but if he repeats the IgG test and he gets the same results from a different lab he should maybe contact Terri Warren. He states he has had no symptoms.

Much to my surprise he had done no research on HSV2 he said he had no outbreaks so there is just no way he has this even with the current positive result. He must retest. I let him vent. I listened. I could have been angry and screamed but then I thought?

What will that ultimately do to help me heal? Nothing? All I can do is offer support...because that is the right thing to do. It will help me heal. It will give me the strength to let go of the anger, self loathing and maybe a little bitterness. After, I hung up...I gotta tell you I felt empowered! I mean yeah I have HSV2 and it will show up but I don't need this man to make me feel like I can still achieve things.

I know he was in shock...just as I was a week ago. Stranded in a tunnel waiting to be recused. I truly had no hope...until I did. I woke-up. I got up. I checked in to MY life.

Anyway....just thought I'd share.

Oh and even through this earlier today with the call and the doctors follow-up...I ended the day celebrating my dad's 66th bday party.

So overalll...lesson learned from all the posts...be kind...don't resent...move forward...be present... help people...listen...even if you feel they might have not been all you needed them to be for you in the past with your diagnosis....at least you can change the pattern.

Goodnight/Good Morning

Cecilia

Wow! I really admire how you handled this situation. You're such a strong woman.

A result of 5 is considered a true positive. False positives can occur, but almost always in the range of .90-3.5. My own result was > 5.0. The lab did not give an exact result, just "greater than 5.0" which would indicate an established infection. I did go ahead and retest for my own peace of mind, like in case there was some lab mix-up, because I did not have obvious symptoms. Got the same result, but it was reassuring.

Strong, indeed!! It takes a lot of self awareness and character to take the high road when many of us would be overpowered by the temptation to say something insensitive and hurtful. Perhaps his doctor will explain the whole asymtomatic thing. Like optimist said, above 3.5 is positive. Whether your index value is 5 or 55 it doesn't tell us anything except this person has HSV.

The world needs more people like you, @Cecilia!!