Disclosing failed

So there's this guy I was on and off with for a few months. We recently started talking again and he told me about his interest in being with me sexually. The red flags went up and I immediately said no. Well I really thought I finally found a decent guy and didn't want to lose him so I disclosed to him my story through text. He said he was fine with it and wanted to be with me. He actually said he wanted me to be his girlfriend. I was on such a high thinking I finally found Mr. Right. Well the next day he ignores me completely and blocks me from all social medias. I'm not heartbroken that he did so. I'm just so sad that I told my deepest secret, a secret I haven't even told to my family, to someone who I thought I had a future with just for them to turn around and do such a thing. I'm trying to be strong and not cry, but I am in such disbelief that things could go so wrong in less than 24 hours. I'm just so tired of trying. I'm trying to be strong and take it day by day, but days like this makes me want to just give up.

I'm sorry, @cier. That really sucks. The way he treated you speaks volumes about his character, and you didn't deserve that. By all means, cry...I know I usually feel better after! It's not weakness--it's admitting that something hurt and then releasing it so you can move forward. The thing is, when we try to block or numb negative emotions, we're blocking the positive ones too.

I also want to acknowledge your courage to disclose. I haven't done it yet. Not really.....just to a previous long-distance fling who knew I was getting lab results the day of my diagnosis, and to my ex-husband via e-mail. It inspires me a lot to hear about other people disclosing, even when it doesn't work out.

There's a quote by Theodore Roosevelt which I thought of when I read your post:

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

{hugs}

Fuck 'em. Forget that guy and move on with your life.

If he can't get with the program, go make yourself available to an attractive guy who will. They are definitely out there. A lot of people don't give a crap if someone has herpes. Hell, he probably already has herpes but doesn't know it since something like 9/10 people have some form of herpes already and 80% don't know they have it.

Thanks ladies! I don't think I want to ever have to do that again though. It really put me down and I've been in a bad spot ever since. I dont know. I'm just so sad lately. Part of me wants to find someone to love and be loved by, but then when I think of how bad this rejection went, I just want to stay single forever. Is this normal to feel like this?