My Story: Boyfriend gave me herpes via oral sex

I have herpes.

What a load off my chest.

I know that I know none of you personally and anyone who reads this probably doesn’t know who I am, but despite that I have told you something I don’t even tell my closest friends.

I’ve had herpes for about four months and the first outbreak had to be one of the most, if not THE most, painful thing I’ve ever experienced. I had no idea what was going on to my body, so you can imagine the shock when my doctor brought up the possibility of me having the STD. My heart dropped. There was no way.

I was in a monogamous relationship for four years and both he and I were virgins when we met. I had been with no one else. So you can imagine what was going on through my head. The words, “My amazing, sweet, and loving boyfriend…cheated on me.” The thought was worse than getting diagnosed.

It turns out, however, he had HSV-1 since he was a little kid and had mistaken it for only cold sores of the mouth. Turns out HSV-1 can be transferred to different areas of the body. We had no idea.

He got tested and came back positive for HSV-1. So did I.

I can’t be angry with him. It’s not as if he purposely tried to give this to me, he had no clue. Even if he did know, I’m not sure if it would have exactly changed anything in our relationship; now that I’ve been fully informed about HSV. It’s strange how much the media brings such a negative vibe on Herpes; as if only unfaithful and the sex-crazed get this virus and anyone with it should be shunned. Huh…

You know, in a way, I’m kind of thankful for Herpes. It’s given me a better sense of judgment.

Hi Maple!

I am in a similar boat. I was diagnosed about a month ago with genital HSV 1. I always knew you could get type 1 "down there", but was totally shocked when I found out. The guy I was with had no sores and claims he's never had a cold sore. It's terrible and I'm so confused! Especially since this is such a traumatic experience. I really think we need better public health efforts to raise more awareness about herpes.

I'm sorry this happened to you. I'm glad you found this site, too. Welcome :)

Hell maple :)

I had a similar experience. Ihave had H since September. The Guy iwas with had a cold sore and I for HSV1 as well. Hawkeye didn't believe it was him who gave it to me and he didn't have H. Its a tough thing to go threw. My first 2 Obs were painful icouldnt walk, sit, stand, lay down nothing iwas in so Mich pain. Ihave ttold a few friends about it and no one has judged me its an honest mistake that happened and we can't blame ourselves.

I'm glad you took having H as a positive thing :) if you ever need to talk you can.message me :)