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I just need some advice about dating.


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I was diagnosed Dec 23rd 2015.

 

I decided it was time to at least get my feet wet again in the dating world. I wasn't really expecting anything. To be perfectly honest, I wasn't even certain if I would go out. The person who gave this to me was physically and emotionally abusive and didn't tell me he had it. I know I didn't want to be that person. But it takes a lot of courage, and I'm not sure about the when to tell or how.

 

I met someone who surprisingly has a lot in common with me. We text everyday and have been on 1 date. I expressed that I wanted to take dating a.little slow and he seemed fine with that. We didn't kiss on our first date which was fine with me since I was so nervous.

 

So to be clear I have hsv1. I'm currently on acyclovir, it's a really small dose. Just this morning I realized I have little tiny clear bumps on the bottom of my palette below my tongue. I have no lesions on my lips or anywhere else for that matter. Does this mean I can't kiss him? They don't hurt, they don't itch...but they were never there before...

 

Also when do people share? I can't imagine there's a perfect time to have this conversation. Keep in mind this is date #2, I'm certainly not ready to have the conversation then. But how much info is too much? Is there such a thing as good timing?

 

Dating was already hard enough...augh.

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You have oral HSV1?

 

 

Recently diagnosed, not really sure how to go about it myself. My ex (I'm assuming at this point she is) gave it to me. I'm still figuring out how to go about it myself and I plan to be off the market until I can figure it out.

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To answer your original question, I'd wait and see how the next meet goes. Like you said, it is a timing issue. I'm not really sure how to do it myself. I wouldn't do anything with those bumps you are concerned about, definitely as a precaution.

 

As for you having it in both locations, did you acquire it at the same time? I have oral as of a month ago, and was freaking out I have got it genitally. However, I didn't have any symptoms down there or an outbreak, and am picking peoples minds to see if that should put me at ease.

 

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When I was first diagnosed it was genital. I had no symptoms of the virus orally until later. I knew it was from my ex because I ended everything and didn't see anyone else after.

 

There's a possibility that you could have it elsewhere and just not show symptoms. If you want peace of.mind you could always get tested. Although I'm not in the medical field, so I'm not sure how they would know if you're not symptomatic. There are people who only have hsv1 orally.

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Yeah, I'm just a bit over the top in the paranoid department. I'm just hoping I do have it orally. The issue would be if I was tested that they wouldn't be able to tell if I have anything genitally, considering I have tested positive for it orally.

 

Just the paranoia speaking. Figured if I got from her kissing, she had to have given it to me genitally via oral (even though statistically, logically, and otherwise that is highly unlikely).

 

Back to you though, I'm trying to figure out how to disclose myself. I'm not sure how, but if it goes well again maybe mention it? Or ask what they know about it? I'm sure there are some others here with more experience who could make a better suggestion than I.

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