I have so many questions.. I need help

So I'm 18 and a female. I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now and he knows. I am also sorry that this is going to be extremely long.

I just found out last Monday that I am positive for HSV. I can't remember which one it was exactly because my Doctor called me with the results and I of course couldn't focus or listen. All I heard was you are positive for hsv and that's as far as I listened. But they are on my genitals (I read you can have both on your genitals apparently) and I just have so many questions and I need somebody to talk to. I got them from my boyfriend, and he already knows. We're very open about things in our relationship and before I even went to the dr I had mentioned that I was going because I had these bumps on my vagina. He's tried his best to comfort me and nothing is working.

I'm taking the medicine for it and it ends tomorrow, but I feel like crap emotionally. It's like everything I do somehow relates back to my problem and I just get so upset at him and at life. We've been together for a long time and so I don't plan on leaving him over it, but I'm still really upset that we didn't take many precautions. We both knew he had it on his mouth, and we didn't do anything to prevent it. We also didn't know you could transfer it from mouth to genitals. But long story short, we both knew he had it and didn't think anything of it. We were always careful with not kissing and not doing oral when he had an outbreak and we didn't really do anything else to prevent it though.

I recently got a new job and for it, I have to be tested for TB, and on the paper it asked if I was taking steroids or a certain type of drugs and I had asked about them because I wasn't sure what they were and they said what kind and they listed the medicine I'm currently on and they said "well we will more than likely have to retest you after you're off of your medicine. It can give false answers" so of course I felt like crap for that. And now doing more paperwork for that job (it's kind of a big job, a lot of confidentiality papers, finger printing, etc) I came across a paper saying that I should get a HBV shot and in it it was saying that since I will more than likely come in contact with blood, I could be coming into contact with HIV and I read that it's now easier for me to contract that since I'm HSV positive and my mind is just running a million miles a second.

I have so many questions. I shave down there often and I thought they were just shave bumps at first so I didn't do anything about it until they became very painful. I eventually went to the dr because it had spread to my butt hole and I could barely even wipe. That's when I decided to go to the dr.

So question number 1: Do I have to throw my razors away if I used them during an outbreak? Obviously I won't do it again knowing what it is now, but what if I were to do it right before and then I suddenly break out? 2: Do I have to throw away my wash scrubbie for the shower if I have an outbreak? 3: can it stay like in my laundry even after I wash it? On my medicine at one point, it got to where I couldn't even wear panties or pants because anything touching it bothered it SO much. I don't really know much about this and I just need help. I feel like crap emotionally and I find it hard to do things throughout my day. I'm a full time student at college and I'm about to become a part time worker again.

Hi! :)

So I am recently diagnosed too...however I know a thing or two about medicine and infection control (I'm an RN). During an outbreak, you probably won't WANT to shave -or at least I didn't wanna come in hot with a sharp object to my genitals let alone with sores. LOL....HOWEVER, if you do shave, it's probably best you use a clean razor and then dispose of it afterwards. It's simply good hygiene and that way you won't be introducing any bacteria to other cuts/sores you may have that your skin would already be harboring. Additionally, you wouldn't want to introduce the bacteria that your sores are harboring to other areas such as your legs or armpits - again, it's simply just hygienic.

Yes, herpes is transmitted from skin-to-skin contact, NOT from bodily fluids like blood or sexual fluids or saliva.... and from what I understand, it doesn't dig inanimate objects for too long so the virus doesn't survive outside of a human host. Hence why you can't get herpes from a toilet seat. ;) So please don't worry about your clothes or other things like sheets and such. Once you wash them, they will be good as new! As for the loofa....I personally went out and got a new one that I plan on using after my outbreak is healed. But I never touched my loofa to my sores because ouch. Again, that's me being a germaphobe but I also find it just to be good hygiene. Walmart or Target has them for like..3 bux ;)

** As a sidebar - your new job seems like it's in the medical field. If so, I wouldn't panic about the HBV shot. It's protocol and really it's something you've already gotten before as a baby. You just need a booster shot to make sure you stay immune to it since you'll be in contact with other people's fluids. It's your employer keeping you safe. Hep B is typically spread through blood or other bodily fluids, like semen or vaginal excretions - totally separate from HSV but still a concern. As far as HIV goes...yes, we are more prone to getting HIV if we are exposed to it because, well, we are more prone to getting open sores on our body which can compromise our immune system and thus be an entry way to diseases. But again, this is just your employer trying to protect you so you know the risks. You won't acquire it so easily if you take the proper precautions. Have you learned about standard precautions? These are safety measures used to ensure proper infection control. If someone IS HIV+, you will know that using gloves and proper needle handling is essential. Remember, HIV is NOT skin-to-skin contact, but is transmitted through bodily fluids such as blood, semen, pre-seminal fluids, rectal fluids, vaginal fluids, and breast milk. Not saliva. Will you be handling needles? As long as you are safe and trained how to handle dirty needles I have no doubt you'll be safe. Your employer should allow for proper training in that area. Additionally, condoms are still a MUST because you still need to protect yourself from other STIs that may be lurking in people who don't know it..and I'm sure you are with me when I say we don't need to accumulate a list of acquired STDs. NO GLOVE, NO LOVE...and that goes for your hands too in the medical field or anywhere you'll be handling or coming into contact with blood or other fluids :) **

I'm new to this too girlfriend, and I feel your emotional distress. I'm having a difficult time. In fact, I'm still going through my first outbreak - NOT fun. I haven't been able to talk to anyone and this site has been so supportive...What you might want to do, and what has helped me become more optimistic even after one week, is look through the other discussions. ESPECIALLY the ones that @adrial has posted in the FAQ section. He posts a lot of REALLY great information on herpes itself, how to care for outbreaks, emotional distress, dating & sex after herpes, and just plain optimistic advice. It really has helped me emotionally. What I keep telling myself is that this is just a glorified skin condition that so many people live with every day. The information has proven that we are not alone. Try not to get caught up in your own guilt trip...which is so easier said than done, I know. You can't change the past, you can only move forward from here.

There are many veterans on this site that I'm sure can give you more accurate, experienced advice. But this is just my 2cents.

Keep your head high. We can get through this. I just know it.

Thank you.. I didn't know if I was being "extra" when I threw those things away. I mostly shaved down there because I just wanted to make sure it wasn't razor bumps. But holy crap they burned like crazy. This was also my first outbreak.. Today I end my medicine for it finally and I feel like that's trying to kill me too. They're so big.. Mine went away about 3 days ago but from experience with other medicine when I was sick before, I'm definitely taking this all the way out.

Haha! No no you're not being extra. Switching those things out are good to do every so often. I just started my medication yesterday. I have to take acyclovir 3x a day on top of which I have a bacterial infection so I have to take another antibiotic 2x a day...so I understand how difficult taking the pills are. I'm hoping to feel better soon. I'm glad you are physically feeling better.

The emotional aspect will ebb and flow for a while. Yesterday, I was feeling optimistic. Today, i woke up fairly distressed.