WhoopsiDaysi's guest blog: "What I wish I knew when I was first diagnosed with herpes"

I can remember when I was first diagnosed with herpes. It was around December 3, 2011. I had a few things come at me – I became an empty nester and about six weeks later my husband left. My life was turned upside down, to say the least, and then I got herpes symptoms that would suggest my worst nightmare (probably as a result of all the stress I was feeling). I tried to ignore the symptoms for a few days, tried my own remedies, tried to rationalize that it was nothing, but eventually I gave in and went for testing because it wasn’t going away. I wish I would have known then what I know now.

Read the rest of WhoopsiDaysi's blog here:

http://herpeslife.com/what-i-wish-i-knew-when-i-was-first-diagnosed-with-herpes/

What you say in this article reminds me that we can't possibly know what the future has in store for us. The more we worry, the more we destroy our ability to be happy NOW. It doesn't do any good for us to assume what our future will be like based on what is happening now. So let's just be happy now and trust that everything will turn out beautifully. What have we got to lose? Thanks for the reminder, Brenda. :)

B, we were diagnosed four days apart. I was on December 7th.

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I hope physicians and others who are caregivers will read it and see the need for compassion, education and more sensitivity and dedication to following up with patients post diagnosis. Even to refer them to this site! My situation was handled very much the same as yours. If I weren't a reader/reasearcher I would have been completely lost! I was absolutely devastated leaving the doctor's office and so disoriented. I kept repeating the words the doctor said to me over and over. It was awful!

I believe it is the stigma of herpes that allows this kind of bs to continue, and I for one am ready to create change. Bringing it out of the darkness and into the light is the first step. And I KNOW what you shared is going to help a lot of people.

Thanks again for putting yourself out there to be a support and encouragement to others.

much love,

Kristin

I want to create a handout that we can email to doctors and clinics as a pdf to inform them of the best way to handle newly diagnosed patients so this doesn't happen again. It's just sad that as the first opportunity to shine some positivity into someone's life during a dark time is met with ignorance. Breaks my heart.

I love that, A. What an awesome resource that would be.

I was doing my nerd thing this morning looking at creating an HOpp app for us. It would be cool to send a box of biz cards with a QR code on it patients could scan with their smart phones and be jettisoned here and to the podcasts for support and encouragement. Dreaming..but I'm thinking I will be talking to you about it.

That would have been so helpful to me. I am actually seeing a new doctor now because of how poorly this diagnosis was handled with me. I remember when I told Dr. New Guy what happened and how I thought I got H, he just listened like I was the only woman he'd ever met with herpes...and then he put his hand on my arm and said, "Kristin...it's going to be okay. You're still you...you're gonna be okay." And I couldn't hold back. I sobbed. And he just waited for me. It did so much more for my healing than anything else he could have ever done.

I tease him now, when I go in for exams and tell him I know women fall in love with their gynocologists all the time, but our love is real. ;)

If your doctor treated you well post-diagnosis, and gave you some kind of information, send them a thank you note. I don't think it's very common.

I think some sort of resource for doctors would be awesome. I have been thinking about this myself. I can't remember anyone who has been diagnosed that I talked to ever saying their doctor was knowledgeable about herpes. Even my own naturopath had limited knowledge. Kristin, you are so lucky to have found such an understanding OBGYN. How could you not fall in love with a man like that! LOL

I am going to put my thoughts together. If you two don't mind, maybe we can create something together? I would be more than willing to pass it along to some of the caregivers and doctors I know. If we can help one person walk away feeling empowered instead of like the bottom just fell out of their world, it would be so worth it. I am thinking of also including resources for people to turn to in the local area and on the internet. Knowledge and community is huge in the healing process, as we all know.

Love your blog WD!!! I could relate so much of it! I agree with both of you that doctors need educating. I didn't get anything from mine either...had to push for a test and she said she didnt' think i had it. A phone call diagnosis to tell me I was positive and that was it! no advice, followup NOTHING! I called back crying and asking for advice and was just told to call the National Herpes Foundation. If I was young, inexperienced and lacking confidence I would have been in an even worse emotional state! I'm starting to get more proactive too to help others. :-) Love to you my lovely H mates :-)