Officially diagnosed today with HSV 2 and feeling really crappy

I don’t know why I was hoping for HSV 1. Maybe because I’ve gone through tons of posts on this forum where people are quoting HSV 2 as “the bad one” but I want to curl up into a ball and just cry.

Any sort of comfort or advice is really needed right now. I’m a wreck....

Fortunately, life will go on. There are millions even billions of people who wish they had your circumstance in life (presuming you live in America, Canada, or Europe). We have the freedom of opportunity to increase our social mobility and accomplish goals we have-- which you can still do even with herpes. In other parts of the world, say Africa, India, some parts of Asia, they do not even have the basic necessities of life-- food, clean water, clothing, housing, etc. Life is all relative.

Not to try to tell you that you aren't going through a profound struggle.

But in essence, the two diagnosis are not very different.

All of us here each share in some part of the feelings of shame, depression anger and lack of self-worth that you probably feel.

The important thing is not to dwell on what could have been, but rather the good things that will be.

And I'm not trying to sling some zen BS.

This is real, important work you can do to help yourself.

Herpes doesn't chamge much. In fact, my own experience dictates that herpes hasn't changed anything outside a temporary struggle to regain my self respect.

I tested myself in a way that only I can test me.

I challenged myself to see where I would fail, in relationship, common decency, work, college, and personal goals. I did just as well post diagnosis as I ever would have. And that should seem surprising, but it was pretty shocking to me at the time. I saw first hand that I am who I am and my diagnosis didn't change a thing.

I'm still good at all the things I used to be good at. I'm still as good a person, as desirable and capable as ever.

You are too.

So, when you've had enough of curling up in a ball and greiving something that isn't even lost at all, begin by relearning how to appreciate yourself.

Because you deserve your own appreiation and admiration.

Honestly, I've never really understood why HSV2 would be considered "the bad one". I'm not trying to say one is much better then the other, but at least with HSV2 it's more private and you really don't have to worry about spreading it to people you're not sleeping with.

An interesting exercise I did with myself, "Would you rather" and HSV2 was the better option nearly every time. I don't want to go into too much detail in order to not make me seem like a judgmental person, but some of the thing I compared were being 2 inches shorter (height that is! lol), less athletic, less intelligent, enjoyable career, and more serious medical issues.

You likely won't get over it overnight, but you'll get over it as soon as you realize it's not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. I'm not really a big believer in everything happens for a reason, but rather you are in control of how you handle situations and it's up to your how they impact you.

Thank you.

Not to dwell on one comment but just because someone else has it worse off than I do doesn’t mean that doesn’t give me a reason to not be upset. I am upset. I also have stage 1 cervical cancer as well so I seem to be having some sort of bad luck all in that region down there. Perhaps I should have been a nun lol.

The only reason why I referred to it as “the bad one” is because I have seen about 10 different threads on this particular site where that’s what people seem to refer to it as.

What bothers me a lot is the interruption and granted this was my initial OB it interrupted my life in more ways than one. I was unable to work for an entire week, wasn’t able to have my child (I’m a single mom) because I couldn’t handle the pain, I missed an important event in my sons life, I wasn’t able to go to a couple things which ironically this was the most busiest week over the next 6 months of my life. It was just a nuisance. That and combined with my other treatment it’s just been a life changer for me.

Hi @Kp07,

This is indeed a difficult challenge, specially the first year. If you have additional health concerns besides herpes, it is normal that you have all this anxiety, and you feel lost, confused, and targeted by life ("why me?" feelings).

However, believe me, you will be able to control the virus and the whole situation very well in the next months.

Regarding herpes, the first outbreak is the worst, and very rarely will strike with the same force in the future.

There are tones of things you can do to manage the recurrence and severity of the future outbreaks, to the point they will practically disappear, specially after the first year, when your inmune system adapts to fight the virus.

Your inmune system will learn to "catch" the virus when it gets out of hibernation.

In addition to your body recognizing the virus and learning to fight it, several things can be done to strengthen your inmune system. Those things do make a difference, and the list goes something like this:

- a healthy green diet (avoiding chocolate and peanut butter, and other arginine-rich foods, avoding sugar and processed foods)

- light sport, often

- meditation / relax time, often

- natural health-enhancing supplements and super foods: garlic, onions, lemon juice, coconut oil, l-lysine, zinc, creatine monohydrate for sports, aloe vera, etc, etc, etc.

- taking the prescription medication helps A LOT: acyclovir, etc. It is important to follow the correct dose when you feel an outbreak is coming - take it daily if you want to be really safe, as a suppressive therapy.

You will control herpes to the point you almost forget about it. You will suppress it 99%.

Personally, the only concern that have bugged me the most, is the fear of giving it to your partners. This concern will keep you more vigilant than usual when it comes to sex: condoms, softer sex, daily medication, and disclosure to your partners, so they can do an informed decision (the ones who care will be ok with it). The rates of transmission when you take all those steps are really really small.

You will be fine and life will be 99,99% normal again. Once your inmune system is super-charged, herpes becomes like a recurrent annoying bad flu, at least I look at it that way, and it works for me.

Stay healthy.

All the best,

How often are your outbreaks?? I think To me it’s more mental now than the outbreaks! I have Been going to a counselor but haven’t open up yet! I wamt To be I’m so ashamed

Thank you for that advice. I am a walking herbal pharmacy right now lol. I’m taking majority of that. I couldn’t put anything on it at all besides baby powder. This included aloe Vera... the plant. Everything burnt.

I’m now on day 11 and finished my pills. The sores are gone but you can still see where they were. I also found out I have nerve damage because of how severe it was. I missed a week of work which isn’t good. My doctor will not put me on suppression therapy though. Here where I live they will only put you on it if you get outbreaks once a month of 4-5 times a year. Which sucks because now I’m stressing of when I’ll have my next outbreak.

I’m not worried about telling people. To me if they won’t be with me because of it that’s cool. I respect their decision.

Missing exercise is a huge thing for me. I haven’t been able to work out the entire time and I’ve gained 7 lbs. I eat extremely well and always have. Not into sugars or chocolate so I don’t think that can trigger it.

Hey KP. It sucks but it’s not the end of the world. I was diagnosed with 2 via swab on 1/8/18. I’m just finishing up my 2nd outbreak which has been minor. I’m still with the girl that was asymptomatic and gave it to me. For the first month or two, I was very upset and angry. Since then, I’ve been thinking about it less and less. It’s not ideal but at the end of the day, it’s an occasional rash for most people with hsv.

Before you’re with a new partner, do the right thing and disclose. Hang in there. You’ll be fine.

@happyman I disagree with what you’ve claimed in your above submission. It MAY occur less frequently as time goes on and it MAY not bother you 99% of the time and maybe you’re only commenting on your personal experiences, but here’s mine:

I have had both strains for a total of 20 years now. After the horrific first outbreak, I rarely ever had outbreaks and if I did, it was a single bump that looked like a zit.

I was exposed to mold for several years and then after a particularly bad basement flood at my job, I started to have back to back outbreaks (still mild in severity), but still annoying nonetheless. It has now been a few years since that flood and I have never been in worse health than I am in now. The nerve pain is debilitating; it has robbed me of my short term memory, my cognitive and Comprehensive abilities have been severely diminished; I’m exhausted all the time and every time I orgasm it makes all my symptoms worse. It is absolute, pure hell. A lesion is now the least of my worries/problems. I am on a rapid decline that I am afraid will lead to cancer, Alzheimer’s or both. I have been to tons of different specialists and have gotten many second opinions and no one can find any other causes for all of my physical symptoms and cognitive decline. I am only 39 and yet, I feel like an old, tired, (and sometimes, bitter) woman.

Thanks for your input! I was confirmed yesterday that I only have HSV 2 and no HSV 1 which I’m surprised with considering something like a ridiculous high number has 1. I also found out I was a carrier and I’ve had it for awhile but my first outbreak only just occurred this month. I’m now experiencing my second outbreak 3 weeks post diagnosis.

I also have nerve damage from the severity of my first outbreak. It is awful! I constantly feel sun burnt everywhere and I haven’t even gone into the sun. I am constantly itchy everywhere (and I mean everywhere!). It’s all the symptoms of a sunburn minus the actual rash/burn itself. I’m now on nerve blocking meds to try and subside it but the moment I go off them it comes back.

If I get 4 more break outs in the next 12 months I’ll be on permanent suppression meds which I am hopin I don’t need.

Kp07 why do you think you have just been a carrier. That is what I am trying to figure out. Did you have flu symptoms with your first outbreak?

I guess I am really confused on my test results. I have been celibate for about 2 years and have never once had a noticeable outbreak. I had unprotected sex on May 4th and 2 days later got a discharge that changed 3 times, 2 sores and flu like symptoms. For about 2 weeks I was so fatigued, irritable, night sweats and even broke out in a rash on my arm (not sure if that even relates to this). I decided to go to the doctor on May 23rd which was 19 days after possible exposure. My results came back positive for IGG with a value of 13 and also positive for IGM with a value of 1.1. I have read that those IGM tests are not the most accurate in because they are not type specific and with the herpes virus they can show up with recurring outbreaks. I also am not sure if 19 days is enough time for IGG antibodies to show up. I am not sure if I was carrying this and just had my first outbreak or if I was recently exposed. Does anyone have any feedback?

It is possible, yes, although it’s unusual. Given the high vale it’s not a mistake, sorry.

Also given the bad outbreak and unprotected encounter there’s a good chance this is how you got it. Still, you should get it swabbed, at least to compare the type to your igg.

Because I hadn’t had sex in a year and a half, then had sex and two days later had my first outbreak. Experienced everything one is supposed to during a first outbreak. Could have been a walking text book version. I was at the doctors that day for her to look at the blisters and she sent me for immediate blood work. The swab came back positive, the serum came back positive and the levels were showing I have had HSV 2 for over 4 weeks which doesn’t add up considering the guy I slept with happened 48 hours prior only. So I was informed I was a carrier and it’s just coming out now. Something triggered it and my guess is going from no sexual contact to sexual contact.