(And remember, whether you need support or want to lend a hand in supporting others who need it, come join us.)
Guest author from our community: WCSDancer2010
I know you may not be able to imagine this right now, but Herpes really CAN become your Wing-man in both your dating and regular life. The definition of a Wing-man is “… a role that a person may take when a friend needs support with approaching potential partners. A wingman is someone who is on the “inside” and is used to help someone with intimate relationships.” (from Wikipedia)
Guest author from our community: Carlos
“Hello Everyone! Surely I need no introduction. In Western Culture I’m right up there with Leprosy (which totally baffles me). In the 20th century three Influenza pandemics occurred, each caused by the appearance of a new strain of the Flu virus in humans and killed tens of millions of people. In the 4,500 years of my existence on Earth, I have caused zero fatalities… That is ZERO, as in not one! Moreover, comedians capitalize on herpes jokes, but that says more about their lack of creativity that your living with me. I personally can’t stand them; most of their herpes material is so trite. Truth be told, I wish you and I could just be friends. I’m a virus seeking a host, and you just happened to be there. I’m sorry I’ve caused you so much heartache, distress, shame and anger. It was never my intention to hurt you; I’m just trying to survive like any other organism out there. Anyways, I don’t want to take up too much of your time. I’ve asked my friend Carlos to put together a report where the mythology surrounding me and my so-called unclean nature is debunked. Again, now that we are linked together forever, I hope we can come to a deeper understanding of ourselves. My contribution to your pain is not deliberate, and I promise, as times goes by, my moodiness will lessen — like most humans — I too have bad days and flare up. I promise to partake in a stress-free lifestyle, if you do the footwork… And oh yeah, since Mother Nature created ME as well as She did YOU, heck, neither of us is going to be perfect 100% of the time; so let’s turn the self-loathing a couple of notches down… deal?”
The Herpes Simplex Virus (and all my mutations)
And here’s what I have to say …
Last night was Halloween. And I have something to admit to you.
(As I type this, I feel fear and sadness slowly churning in my stomach. Nervous anticipation.)
It feels vulnerable to consider telling you this. Why? Because me “admitting” this could lead to you judging me. Maybe you will judge me, maybe you won’t. I can’t control either your judgments or acceptance or what you will ultimately think of me. But there’s a part of me that judges myself about this, so it’s easy to jump to the assumption that you will judge me, too.
Sound familiar? I am also wanting to share myself with our community in service of deeper connection and understanding. So you can know me better, so we can know ourselves better. And I trust that all of you will receive this well, with acceptance and heart. Because that’s just the kind of community this is. Understanding. Heartfelt. Giving. Loving. Supportive.
So what is this embarrassing admission?
Sometimes it seems like movies and TV shape how people see themselves and one another. That’s why I’m excited that Michael Matucci is bringing a real story about H to the big screen in a Hollywood movie. Michael is making a bold move to take the conversation about H out of the shadows and into mainstream culture. AND… you can help! Contribute something to the Kickstarter campaign (launching in a few days). Even a small donation helps and let’s the crew know how much this matters.
My buddy David (who also helps to lead the Herpes Opportunity weekend workshops) and I had a great chat with the creator/writer Michael Matucci about this upcoming movie (set to start filming in a few months) called “Party Favors.” We talk about why he created it and what he wants people to get from the movie:
[ KICKSTARTER CAMPAIGN LAUNCHING SOON! ]
This is a question brought up a lot on the Herpes Opportunity forums.
“Should I / How do I disclose that I get cold sores to potential partners before kissing them?”
The answer can be a confusing one, simply because it’s up to the individual on what’s right or not. And there has been a great debate on the forum before about it, and recently another question on this topic has been thrown into the ring …
So let’s get into this question a bit deeper, shall we? More >
“You suck. You’re worthless. You won’t find someone to love you. Who would possibly accept you with this disgusting H thing? Who are you kidding? You should give up — right now!”
Let’s get one thing perfectly clear: I’m not the one saying all these nasty things to you right now. No, no, no — I couldn’t be that cruel even to my worst enemy! Based off of so many people I’ve talked with in our Herpes Opportunity forums, our Herpes Opportunity weekend workshop and private coaching clients, I have heard this kind of junk coming straight out of their own heads! And I assume that on some level that kind of smack-talking is going on in your head … right … now.
So what’s the answer to why you suck?
Guest author from our community: Beckie
For years, I found ways to deny that I have herpes. My first herpes outbreak was brutal and traumatic, but after that, I never had another herpes outbreak. At the time of the onset, I was in a committed relationship with a supportive partner. And because I wasn’t having any outbreaks to remind me I had herpes, I did a very good job of forgetting about it. And even when I did feel occasional tingling, itching or discomfort, my mind didn’t immediately think it was related to herpes prodrome symptoms — I just brushed it off as nothing.
Guest author from our community: Ashley
I’ve had herpes for four years now. I take daily suppressive medication (Acyclovir) and that helps to keep outbreaks at bay. Early on, I didn’t have health insurance. I had to find more holistic remedies that didn’t cost me $50 per month. Below are the top herpes treatments that I’ve found and that work for me. There are plenty of others that you can find online, but I can’t speak to their efficacy.
Guest author from our community: WhoopsiDaysi
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” — Anais Nin
I would be lying if I said getting herpes was the best thing to ever happen to me. Much like I would not say being divorced was the best thing to ever happen to me — three times. (But that is another blog altogether.) What was the best thing to happen to me though was what I learned from those experiences. As painful as they both were to deal with, and as much as I thought “my life is over” after each event, I realized that hidden within those experiences were lessons waiting for me to learn. I learned we are the masters of our destiny and also of our mind. We choose what we think, how we feel, what we believe, and how we are going to react in any given situation. The experience of having herpes is no different.